I think I just came to the realization that hanging around the negative people didn’t leave me feeling like a very nice person. I’d review the conversation in my head and would think about how hurt I’d feel if I knew someone had talked about me the way I’d talked about them with the negative person. Or I’d find myself complaining with more frequency, almost as if I had to one-up the negative person by being worse off somehow — what a bizarre first-place trophy to strive for, right?

The bottom line is that I live a really decent life, with a husband who’s loved me for the 32 years we’ve been together, kids I enjoy spending time with, and work that I like quite a bit. Thinking of those positives really makes the petty stuff seem extra insignificant.

I didn’t want to become “that” person that nobody wants to hang around because they’re always a downer. Spending more time with positive people gave every day an “up” spin that’s hard to beat, and put everything else in perspective. Eventually I started thinking more positively on my own, and focusing on bringing the positive to the conversations with negative people when I had to interact with them.