I think it’s extra difficult when editors are sticklers for “proper” over “voice.” I’m an unapologetic follower of The Chicago Manual of Style, but certain books need a more conversational tone than others. You don’t want a sterile book that follows English teacher-type rules. And truthfully, many of those rules aren’t actually rules (editors call them zombie rules) but people spout them off without knowing they’re simply old/bad habits, or preferences that have long since gone out of style.

Finding an editor is similar to finding a significant other: get you someone who will take you seriously but will also make you laugh, encourage you while guiding you. And maybe send chocolate once in a while.